Having said that, there was a disturbing event that must be discussed. Someone stole a pack of hot dogs from the fridge and a corresponding pack of buns from the counter. Who goes to a party and steals unopened food, let alone food of such a mundane nature? Curiosity clashing with host offense, I have compiled a list of suspects. These suspects were corralled based on several varying criteria. They pictured below and described from left to right.
Jena (top left) arrived late and cleverly caused a distraction by claiming to anyone who would listen, that her fryer was missing the cord. To add to the suspicion, she refused to open it, saying it was full of oil. Was it really full of oil or was it full of hot dogs and buns? Amidst a hasty escape, she left her frying supplies (which included Mars chocolate bars and pickles), so if she did make a sacrifice for the hot dogs/buns, I clearly won out.
Stephannie is a new mother, and may be unaware of the dietary requirements of infants. She may have seen the supplies as a quick and easy way of providing protein for her child. Hot dogs for her, and hot dog broth for the baby's bottle. She also had a large purse which she never put down.
Leshonn's crew. I say "crew" because two members were black and I'm making an subtle editorial distinction meant to convey ethnicity, which to racist people will imply guilt. Also, I lump all four individuals into one "suspect" as they all look the same to me. Now, to be fair, the only real fuel for suspicion for this group is that they very abruptly left after only a few minutes. To add mystery, they brought a chocolate cake (made from scratch, mind you) made up to look like an egg with bacon all over it. I can't imagine their master plan was to slave over this dessert/breakfast confection/atrocity only to steal some crappy hot dogs and buns. Still, there were two girls with purses, and the guys shirts were baggy enough to easily conceal the items with a minimum amount of discussion.
Buffy. Although one would think she'd not be able to get her hands on these items, she is much more clever than one would imagine (especially when surrounded by drunks).
Leshonn's crew. I say "crew" because two members were black and I'm making an subtle editorial distinction meant to convey ethnicity, which to racist people will imply guilt. Also, I lump all four individuals into one "suspect" as they all look the same to me. Now, to be fair, the only real fuel for suspicion for this group is that they very abruptly left after only a few minutes. To add mystery, they brought a chocolate cake (made from scratch, mind you) made up to look like an egg with bacon all over it. I can't imagine their master plan was to slave over this dessert/breakfast confection/atrocity only to steal some crappy hot dogs and buns. Still, there were two girls with purses, and the guys shirts were baggy enough to easily conceal the items with a minimum amount of discussion.
Buffy. Although one would think she'd not be able to get her hands on these items, she is much more clever than one would imagine (especially when surrounded by drunks).
If you have any information surrounding the whereabouts of these hot dogs, please let me know.
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